Funny Stories

[peanutterb]

I thought it'd be fun to start a thread about funny experiences we've had on the cleanse that only other master squeezers will really appreciate.

I've had a few:
- barely waking up late one night to go pee and walking into the linen closet instead.
- my garlic clove eating incident (in the 2006 thread)
- buying 6 gallons of water and 2 12 packs of bottled water and the guy at the store asking if I was afraid of the bird flu
- on my 1st day cleansing after explaining to my sis that i'll only have lemonade and tea for the rest of the day she says "ok, well call me when you pass out."

Please share your experiences.

[mycroftxxx]

I just love it when a couple cleansers get together sooner or later they're going to talk about poopy. :P

and not just joking, its going to be a real serious discussion of what kind of poopy... runny, runny with solids or the occasional solid poopy. Serious discussion about how many times a day they poopy and seriously talk about the color of the poopy.

... its like as soon as you stop putting things in your mouth people start getting fixated about the other end of things.

hmmm poopy was mentioned 5 times in my post here... lets see if anybody can mention poopy more than that in one response... ;D

[fancy1]

Not that it is funny but as I started to feel so good !!!
Everyone was telling me how I should STOP losing weight...
Well I am guessing that my body would know when I was at a good weight for it...
I did let that discourage me and I ate very badly...
Did another cleanse and decided that I was the best judge of what was too much weight to lose.... I felt THAT good... So I guess it is funny that people take an interest when you are skinny.... but not when you are FAT... ANd when you Feel really good, it shows and they just do not like that at all.... so Ironically funny...

[peanutterb]

LOL!
Dios mio!
you guys are awesome. I've always been fascinated with poops. My two best girlsfriends and I call each other when we have a real good one
"hey Sash, I just **** a squirrel" lol that's good clean fun right there.

Fancy - it's so true. if you're fat that's not good enough. if you lose too much weight that's not good enough either (but that's just jealousy) AS LONG AS YOU FEEL GOOD AND YOUR BODY SAYS IT FEELS GOOD, KEEP GOING STRONG.
when i first started losing weight last year (I was 167 and now I'm 149) my sis used to say wow look at how much weight you've lost! but she'd say it with such contempt I'd want to cover myself. yesterday she told me my face looks sallow (i had to go look it up but i knew from her tone it wasn't a good thing) She's ready for me to be off this fast I can tell. Not too sure why. She may think I'm starving myself but last night when we did kickboxing, I did in fact kick her ass - with my silly lemonade at my side.

MORE STORIES! I love hearing about people and poops and all that good stuff.

[Yellowgirl]

LOL all!

I don't mind talking about poop but please don't anyone post a photo of your "masterpiece!" TMI....TMI....

:

[peanutterb]

Funny story:

I remember part of last night's dream:

there were alot of monkeys. (which isn't strange bc where I'm from has alot of monkeys) but i was scared of them. There was alot. hundreds of them. and I fell down a hill with them and they all rolled up into little balls at first I thought to hurt me but turned out they were helping me. and we talked and they gave me a secret power to eat leaves and change things. I just had to figure out which leaves did what.

SO skip to another part I remember
I'm on the show America's Next Top Model, except it's mixed with a few other reality shows so it's also kinda like survivor. We're all living in a house and that girl Jade from this cycle is there as well (can you tell I watched the show last night) Anyway, we have a challenge, I don't remember what it is and we are out gathering stuff in a golf cart. Me and three girls. And there are some little kids playing with something we want and they started acting funny so I picked up a leaf off the ground, ate it and blew on the little boy and he turned into a bowl of brown rice. The other little kids were like turn him back and I was like, I donno how to do that. And then Gina, also on the current ANTM cycle said he may not be rice, he may be dead and we should eat the rice.

lol
had to share this one

LMAO. wow.

[danielle_ny]

Alright, I have 2 stories......

1) I started my 1st MC last Sat morning.... so, here I am freaking out about doing "everything by the book"... I have to get up at 5:30am for the SWF on weekdays, or else I miss my train.... Yesterday (Wed, day 5 of my MC) I guess the power must of went our during the night, that I opened my eyes, and the alarm clock was blinking........12am.......12 am..... It hits you in 1 second - OH MY GOD, I AM LATE AND NEED TO SWF !!! I run out of bed, go to the kitchen, let the dogs out, mix my SWF - and once I look at the microwave clock (cuz I have this game where I race the clock and try to drink the entire SWK in less than 2 mins) - it was only 2:20am !!! So, here I am - totally freaking out cuz I didnt do the SWF in the middle of the night !! Standing in the kitchen in the middle of the night, with the bottle of SWF in my hands..... My BF hears the commotion and gets up to see if I am ok...... Now he REALLY thinks I am crazy !! He was like - "I CANT BELIEVE YOU GOT UP AT 2:30AM TO DRINK THAT NASTY STUFF !! YOU ARE CRAZY, OBSSESSED WITH THIS MC AND YOUR POOP - HONEY, PLS STOP THIS MADNESS".... hahaha - I felt sorry for him..... And - hid hair was sticking up EVERYWHERE - which just made me crap up, and take a while to clarify that it was all a mistake, and NO I AM NOT STOPPING, AND YES I AMMMMMMMMMMMM OBSSESSED WITH MY POOP NOWWWWWWWWW !!! hahaha

2) alright the second funny story was a dream - in my dream, I totally forgot that I was doing the MC, and ATE !! Then when I realized, I FREAKED out and opened up my belly, through my belly button to grab the food that I had eaten...... But, when I got the belly button opened, and I looked in there - it was not like the inside of a persons body - it was like a robot !! And I was COOL, IM ALL METAL NOW !! I thought it was great ! Is that freaky, or what ?? Guess this MC also messes with your head !

3) oh, I can also say that my sister are all campaigning for me to quick this - they just cant believe I have gone 6 days without food.... THey keep emailing me and calling me all the time, to make sure I havent died yet..... haha

peace

[fancy1]

Hey danielle_ny

I too found it amazing that every one could not believe that I went without food for 28 days...

I guess if you think about it, had someone told me that I could do that and not be hungry, have lots of energy, and feel better than I ever have.... I would not have believed it...

so those of us that are willing to believe and have succeeded... just can't understand how people can be so afraid that we will die on this cleanse...

One of the reasons that I don't tell anyone what I am up to as far as my eating habits is that they all do childish things like shove food in my face... Ask me if I am still doing that STUPID diet... Ask DUMB questions over and over again...

I am so glad that ignorance is not contageous, at least not for me.... I would much rather, research, then decide.... prepare... succeed.....

Best of luck to you on your journey...

[lemonnewbie]

=) Hi everyone! Well I started my MC last night and already I had the wierdest dream!!!

I have been waiting to start the MC for weeks and finally the day arrives so I guess all the anticipation affected my sleep last night.

Last night I dreamt that I was preparing my lemonade for the day and I had the SWF already prepared for me to drink. I sat down to drink it and after my first few sips I opened my mouth and all this salt just came pouring out. Something similar to the scene in the movie, The Mummy, LOL!

I was a little hesitant to try the SWF this morning because of that dream but I was only able to get down 4 oz since I just couldn't stand the taste. I will try again tomorrow and see if I can use another strategy =)

[ecomama33]

1) almost our entire town (ok just the Hip folks) are doing this cleanse
2) my friend was trying to turn my husb into a pizza
3) "what is that sticky yello stuff on my sandal and leg??" i thought i just passed gas..
4) a friend looking at non mc-er's thinking "aren't you hungry"??????????
5) so hungry that you'd slice a lemon and dip it in maple syrup and eat it! (2nd day!!)
6) licking a Frito on the 6th day!!! eekkkkkk....
7) a newbie leaving the house after the SWF not knowing what would happen to him.... eeekkkk....
breaking the beautiful glass juicer while "losing it" trying to make the nectar 30 mins too late
9) dreaming about eating tacos loading on avocado and then remembering I"M ON THE MC!!!!!!!!!!! oh ****!
10) sticking my head in the pan of roasted red pepper tomato soup just to fully inhale it's wonderful smell!!
11) MY ENERGY LEVEL IS FABULOUS! I'm gettnig things done i never thought I could while cleansing!